I Couldn’t Wait


I remember as a child not being able to wait until I grew up. I remember my parents buying me a fedora hat just like my Dad’s and a spring coat to match. As I got a little older, I was able to talk my parents into putting cleats on my shoes so that I could hear that glorious, crisp, clicking sound whenever I walked on outdoor pavement after a long, hard, snowy winter. I couldn’t wait to ride my new, Christmas gift chrome-fender Schwinn bike in the spring after waiting all winter. I couldn’t wait to go out after dinner and play ice hockey in the street under streetlights using a frozen piece of ice for a puck and a doctored-up stick because we couldn’t afford the real things. I couldn’t wait to arise around 6a.m. to go to the local field-pond and clear the snow (that I hated to clear from our driveway) so that we could play hockey all day until dinnertime and sneaking out of the house with whatever foodstuffs that I could find to eat for lunch over an open fire. I couldn’t wait for spring to come so that our neighborhood gang could gather to clear out the empty field that would become our baseball diamond for all of the kids to play ~ boys, girls, young and old!

I remember the excitement I felt when my gang and I challenged neighboring rivals to a football game on a wet, muddy day at a neutral field and going up against the “big guys,”  returning home muddied from head-to-toe and listening to my poor mother’s ranting because of the dirt I tracked in and the black eye I sported. I couldn’t wait to wear my new (hot) baseball uniform when I played AAA ball on a regulation baseball diamond with many of my high school friends. I so looked forward to playing intramural softball with my college buddies, writing for the yearbook and putting the college newspaper “to bed” around 2a.m. when we left our final copy at the printers. I couldn’t wait to drive and impress my friends and especially the girls whom I wanted to date.

I couldn’t wait to go to New York City by train and Madison Square Garden for the NCAA Tournament which featured our school against West Virginia (we were miserably beaten but a good time was had by all).

I couldn’t wait to graduate from college and then from graduate school so that I could begin to practice my skills as a psychotherapist. I couldn’t wait to date my friend’s maid of honor and had to wait several months because I was told that she was engaged and how she eventually turned out to be my loving wife. Waiting in the waiting room of the hospital for our first-born and not being told of the birth for some while afterwards was quite  frustrating but well worth the wait nevertheless. I couldn’t wait for our other two children to be born so that I could find out what their lives would be like. I couldn’t wait to start a private practice after working for many social agencies over the years and experiencing that sense of being an “independent practitioner.” I couldn’t wait to move into our first apartment, then our first home with all of its idiosyncrasies and then our final home before moving to Florida in the newest of our homes. I couldn’t wait to play golf, make new friends and to begin my writing career.

I guess that I couldn’t wait for a number of things. Now, I’m in the autumn of my years and am still wondering and waiting for what will most certainly come my way. Waiting seems to help me to always have something to look forward to once I realize that the frustration I experience is only a temporary but necessary part of the waiting process. it’s often very difficult because I don’t really know what lies on the other side of my waiting and frustration but as I’ve grown older … and hopefully a bit wiser … I’ve learned the virtue of patience and the sense of excitement that whatever lies before me in my anticipation of what is yet to come will be both welcomed and a new adventure.  Come to think of it, I’ve spent more time waiting and wondering. Maybe that’s what life is really all about … waiting, wondering and experiencing. I can’t wait to see what’s around the next corner.

(22 August 2012)

Both as a consultant and author, Charles Bonasera’s story-telling have motivated people to change patterns and resolve problems in their lives. All of his books contain valuable, practical lessons that people can easily apply to bettering and managing their lifestyles. He has also written a myriad of articles which can be found on his website at www.charlesmbonasera.com.

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