Virgo children are usually quite easy to raise. They are neat, organized, and have a gentle sense of humor that you will enjoy. They are rarely hateful and mean. They are so well behaved that I think most parents just sort of leave them to themselves since they are like miniature adults. One of the hardest things about being a really good kid is that you melt into the woodwork and nobody notices you anymore. Virgo children are seldom the in your face types, demanding that Mommy and Daddy ‘look at me, look at me!’ They are often the ‘goodly child’ hidden behind the more dynamic and boisterous children. We are so relieved to have the low maintenance Virgo child, that we often ignore their deeper emotional needs while we focus on our other children. Many adult Virgos have a quiet loneliness in their eyes that they pretend is not really there. However, it is there, and it effects many of their decisions and choices as adults. They will give and give of themselves without really allowing anyone else into their inner world, because they really do not know how to connect on a deeper level. They just know how to be the ‘good kid’ and from their perspective that means not needing anything from anyone.
Your Virgo child is the one to call into the kitchen when the Tupperware drawer is overflowing and everything is all catawampus. They will be more then happy to restack and reorganize it for you and it will only take them a quick minute to do so. They are so very helpful and almost always happy to help you with your various chores around the house. The problem is that they begin to think that the only way to get love or to show love is through hands on work. They grow up to have wonderful work ethics, but really are emotionally crippled. They know what they feel in their heart of hearts, but do not have any idea how to show or express love in any other manner. Make a special effort to show your Virgo child that they mean more to you then just good little workers. Teach them other ways to share their hearts besides just their natural willingness to roll up their sleeves and get to work.
Virgos also seem to pick up the idea that in order to be lovable, they need to be perfect. As adults, they can easily become extreme perfectionists. They become quite meticulous and it is a great asset in an employee, but not always the best thing for someone’s self-esteem. Let your Virgo child know that if they fail once in awhile or if they are not the best of the best, that you still love them for who they are on the inside, not for how well they perform their jobs. Do not downplay their natural talents and their wonderful eye for detail, just make sure that they know that you would love them even if they were not so detail-oriented.
Some Virgos have a tendency towards becoming hypochondriacs. This is probably a result of their desire to be physically perfect and it also gives them an excuse not to have to always be at peak performance levels. If you teach your Virgo child at a young age about the mind-body-spirit connection to mental and physical health, and that they can find love without having to be so flawless, they probably won’t feel a need to resort to the medicine cabinet to find their escape from the perfectionist’s treadmill.
One of the greatest gifts you can give to your Virgo child is the freedom to laugh. They have a naturally playful spirit and by teaching them to laugh at how overly serious life can seem, you can free them from a lot of their stress. Get them to loosen up and laugh at themselves once in awhile. Make a special effort to point out to your little Virgo how much you love to see them happy and laughing. Let them know how funny they are and that they should take more time to play and tell silly jokes. Once you unlock the humor within their hearts, you will have given them one of the most precious gifts. Laughter really is the best medicine and if they can whistle while they work, they will relax and have fun with it. By encouraging your Virgo child to touch that childlike spirit of playfulness within, you are giving them permission to be themselves and to find joyful expressions of what is inside their hearts. Give them permission to sing and dance and play, and you give them permission to be less than perfectly mature grown ups. Tell your Virgo again and again how much you love them for simply existing just as they are.
(Copyright 2004, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow’s Edge)
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